Ten people you'll recognise from university halls

It’s safe to say that everyone meets a selection of weird and wonderful people while at university. There will be friends for life, but at the same time there’s always some very odd types and some people you’ll be pleased to see the back of by the end of the year.

1. The noisemaker

You always hear the noisemaker before you see them. For some reason, they don’t seem to have mastered the notion of walking, always opting for stomping instead (the choice of footwear doesn’t help either). The noisemaker enjoys blasting music from their speakers at all times of day (and night!) and doesn’t even turn the volume down during exam season. If they’re returning from a night out, you’ll definitely know about it as the noisemaker always manages to gather an equally loud group of friends.

2. The hermit

In every set of university halls, there’s always that one person nobody else has ever actually seen. Some vague and indistinct sounds of shuffling are the only signs of life. You wonder how they continue to survive: they’ve never been seen in the kitchen, let alone going outside. You’ll be lucky if you see them even a handful of times before you move out, and you probably won’t even know their name.

3. The person who took a gap year

The ‘I went on a gap year’ student just can’t let go of that one time they were in Asia. Sure, they may have ‘found themselves’ – but they certainly won’t let you forget it. They start every conversation with ‘when I was in Asia’ or ‘they don’t do that in Thailand, you know’ and they somehow manage to turn any topic of conversation into recounting their life-changing travels. The gap year student is usually seen in clothes they brought back from their travels and they begin their day with an early morning rise and some meditation or yoga.

4. The professional multitasker

The multitasker is the person everyone aspires to be, but often secretly dislikes. They seem to fit in everything under the sun: they’re bound to be president of at least two societies, they have a vast social circle and their Instagram feed is filled with coffee shop visits and holidays during term-time. They’ll get better grades than you too, despite missing multiple lectures and definitely not doing as much work.

5. The keen bean

The keen bean seems to spend their entire life in the library – even at the start of the year – and they make everybody else stress and feel guilty about not doing enough work. They wake up before 7.00 am everyday even if they don’t have early lectures, they’re always five minutes early to all their plans, and their room is filled with carefully ordered notes, files and a ridiculous amount of stationery (colour-coded and neatly arranged, of course).

6. The mess

The mess really needs to get their life together. You can never count on them to be on time – or even show up at all and their disorganisation is reflected in the state of their room. Sure, everyone has ‘the chair’ with a few loose items draped over it, but the mess has piles of clothes spread out over the floor, which sometimes spill out into the corridor. They’ve never cooked a proper meal, choosing to rely on takeaways, ready meals or pasta with tomato sauce (special occasions only). You wonder if the mess knows how to do laundry – you’ve definitely seen them in the same t-shirt for weeks at a time.

7. The grandparent

The grandparent makes no secret of their dislike for the mess. They’re a terrible gossip and will reliably post in the group chat whenever any sort of mess is left in the kitchen. They would never dream of going on a night out, preferring instead to be in bed by 10.00 pm and demanding silence from then on. The grandparent is often grouchy and irritable and is the only person you’ll ever see at uni using an iron.

8. The prankster

The resident prankster is constantly plotting their latest prank. You may be blessed with a low-key prankster who only hides things, finds it funny and is satisfied, but some pranksters go to extreme lengths to execute their pranks. They may replace your food with horrible alternatives, graffiti your door or try to convince you that it’s a different day. You soon learn to always keep your bedroom door locked: they would enjoy switching things out or playing tricks on you while you’re asleep.

9. The posh flatmate

The posh flatmate usually tries to play down how posh they are – but their accent and controversial opinion on the north/south divide always gives them away. It’s only when they casually mention their yacht, four horses or a scandal at their boarding school that you realise just how posh they actually are. They’re the only one at uni to order their food from Waitrose and their section of the fridge is often stocked with the likes of smoothies, avocado and brie.

10. The mum

Every friendship group has ‘the mum’. The mum is similar to the grandparent, but more fun and not as bitter. The mum somehow arrived at uni already knowing how to cook and do laundry and is often on hand to offer some much-needed advice. They are wise beyond their years, always provide a shoulder to cry on, and offer support in the form of tea and chocolate during stressful times or a bad breakup.

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